Its almost Christmas but I cant find it in myself to give a shit. For some reason, here lately I just dont care about life in general. Its like if a bus came hurdling toward me I wouldnt care enough to move out of the way. Id probly let the bus hit me. I just wouldnt care at all. I dont know why Im feeling this way and where most would be concerned about this feeling I honestly dont care that I dont care. Now you would probly think that thats not true cause if ti was i wouldnt be journaling about it but to be honest Im only journaling because its something for me to do. I dont care whether or not anyone reads this and comments, I dont care if I die, I simply dont care. My parents are starting to become conserned for me but honestly I dont care. My brother is suppose to come down to see me soon and ussually Im jumping for joy but right now i dont give a flyig fuck about it. This feeling is starting to make people notice me and ussually I make damn sure no one notices me but becasue of this feeling I dont give a shit if people do notice me and thats not good. When people notice my existance strange things start to happen. Last time someone nnoticed me that guy got hit by a bus. That was five years ago and he's still in a coma. come to think about it I was feeling exactly like I do now when he noticed me. and all the times before too. When this feeling of not careing shows up people start to notice me and strange things happen. Maybe its connected. I'll have to ask my Sister about that. Hey! I just realized something! That feeling is starting to go away! Maybe journling about it made it leave. Thats great! Well I got to go. Thanks for... listening I guess. Lol.